My name is Tina Fair. I am a qualified therapist with a keen interest in how our relationships impact our wellbeing and how we can improve them.

 I offer online and face to face counselling with both individuals and couples.

For those for whom counselling is not accessible, the aim of this website is, in time, to build into an extensive library of cost effective resources for better relationships and happier lives.

From the moment we are born we develop relationships with those around us. We form patterns in how we relate to others that are largely unconscious, potentially leaving us powerless to change them.

No childhood is perfect and in our attempts to defend ourselves when things go wrong we can develop negative patterns of relating that protect us as children but undermine our attempts to form and maintain strong relationships as adults.

The link between strong, supportive relationships and our general wellbeing is well recognised and when we experience relationship conflict, loneliness and isolation it can lead to stress, anxiety and depression.

A relationship breakdown can leave us feeling hurt, frustrated and helpless as well as battering our self-esteem. 

Identifying our negative patterns and replacing them with more positive ones can help us to avoid communicate clearly, manage our emotional reactions and avoid conflict. Most of us are familiar with attachment issues such as rejection and abandonment and we are encouraged to find healthy attachment. I humbly suggest that relationship harmony lies in moving beyond attachment altogether and finding the connection that lies in the space between us.

This doesn't just apply to intimate relationships, friends and family. How we treat ourselves has a significant impact on our wellbeing too.

Apologies for stating the obvious but we live with ourselves 24 hours a day and if we are judgemental, critical, uncaring of ourselves it is not surprising that we feel anxious, miserable or overwhelmed.

Counselling can be an effective way to explore and resolve relationship and wellbeing issues but is not accessible for everyone due to financial or logistical reasons. It is my hope that the resources on this site may offer an alternative.  

Please check back regularly for updates. 

Healthy attachment is an invaluable part of any relationship but connection feels like a step "beyond attachment".

Connection is a feeling, a sense; we experience it deep within our nervous system. It feels innate, grounded and safe.